Eloy's diary entry 3

My mind felt overclocked with being torn between two causes. Am I fighting for a righteous faction ? I feel as if I was standing on the border between two sides locked in a ravaging war . My muscles untensed and my breathing became shallower. It was the only thing I could hear in my heartless night . I was anticipating gunfire to erupt into fiery chaos anytime now. It did not come . I thought of the severely wounded rebel , hapless and unarmed. His dark etes held the doused flame of the hopelessness and I was troubled. When I had the chance , should I joined the rebellion? But my familial ties with my dear Eulalia and my beloved child would be severed innocently . Would they be influenced by my betrayal sato the army ? I knew the answer ... ... I knew the drums of war was still thundering and I had a choice to choose my destiny . I had never been a decisive man and was at a loss . Dairy , I have lost my bearings , please help me ... ...